Would you want to know he cheated?

Getting smooches from the man I love...

Last night, I was snuggled up with Dr. Z and I threw out one of those awful chick questions that all guys hate. I asked my sweet man this hypothetical question: If we were in our sixties, would you want to find out that I had cheated on you when we were in our 30's? Does it matter at that point in our lives?

Yep, I really asked that. And no, I haven't cheated.

I had been struck with this brilliant question after I read an article on infidelity. Not to mention, my favorite movie is Love Actually, and the pain Emma Thompson feels is so raw, it touches you right through your television screen.  It shows, a lot of folks cheat, both men and women. More than that, I realized a lot of them must get away with it. So knowing that, would you want to know about it many years after the fact?

This was a no-brainer for me. Any woman (or man) who has been cheated on knows the pain and heartache it causes. It takes some people years to get over that kind of betrayal, and some never do. Right now, and I hope for all years in the future, I hold my husband in the highest esteem. He is kind and loving, and a terrific father and step-father. He never yells at me and will quickly hug me if he thinks I'm sad. I can't ask for better. But if I found out he cheated, even thirty years after the fact, I would see him differently. The respect I had for him would be diminished, and sadly, so would the way in which I viewed the life we shared. Even though it's illogical, I would question every tender touch and loving word. I would constantly think about him lovingly touching someone else, and I know I would never recover. Our marriage would be over. I would not want to know. There, I said it. Ignorance is bliss sometimes.

Now that you know my answer, guess what his was. Would he want to know?

Of course, he said.

What?! I asked in shock.

Yep, knowledge is never wrong, he confidently stated.

But would you see me differently?

Probably.

Would you still feel the same about the life we had shared?

Probably not.

But you would still want to know?! Even if it destroyed our marriage?

Yes.

Ugh, I don't get him. Scientists.

Would you want to know? Why or why not??

Trustingly,
Amanda Z
Domesticology